Does He Take You Seriously?




Feb 2, 03:58 pm

          Within the first couple of dates most men already decide whether the woman he’s dating has the potential to be “the one”, or a temporary just “for fun”. Like the difference between a great pair of jeans and the pair you buy because it’s on sale: you’ll wear the latter because it’s comfortable, but you’ll gladly pay full price for the pair that make you look amazing.

          Most men who have been swimming around in the dating pool for longer than a few years don’t expect to be signing on for wedding bells and a mortgage, even when they fall into a relationship. Half of the time his hesitancy is a matter of not being ready to settle down, and the other half of the time it’s a matter of not being with the right one.

          Determine early-on which category you fall under. These clues will help you determine if he’s the real deal or just a waste of your time:

1. He tries to impress you. If he chooses a nice restaurant or makes well-thought-out plans, it means he wants the evening to go as smoothly as possible, and preferably to his credit. He wants to show you how fun, spontaneous, sweet, and thoughtful he is.

2. He pays. It’s his way of letting you know he can and is willing to take care of you—even if you don’t need him to.

3. He’s chivalrous. If he goes out of his way to open the door for you and be on his best behavior, he wants to make as good of an impression on you as you’ve made on him.

4. He asks you questions. Whether it’s about your childhood, your deep, inner passions or your opinion on political affairs, he cares about what you have to say and respects your voice.

5. He’s open. If conversation is flowing seamlessly, he’s probably making an effort to find common ground. Even if jazz sounds like fingernails on a chalkboard, he might approach the subject with an open mind if you seem visibly passionate about Ella Fitz. When he disagrees with your taste in romantic comedies it’s in jest, not judgment.

6. He’s nervous. If you sense he’s nervous during the first couple of dates, it means he cares. Give him some slack.

7. He holds your hand. Taking someone’s hand is a very personal and intimate gesture. He’s smitten with you and wants the world to know you’re his and he’s yours.

8. He doesn’t shy away from the future. If he’s comfortable enough talking about his hypothetical dog and two kids with you, he’s probably mapping out what you’re going to look like in his future, too.

9. He invites you up, but doesn’t insist on it. If you do accept, he doesn’t hand you a beer or see that as an immediate invitation to advance.

10. He walks you to your car. Even if he’s only known you for a few hours, he cares about being a gentleman and your protector.

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